Putting on socks, why was it so difficult?

Just now, I put one foot on the chair and put on a sock, standing up.

I’m not sure if my left leg is numb or stiff, but I feel uncomfortable.

---

To put on socks, I had to sit down and put them on.

My body stumbled, and even if I lowered my head just a little,

my center of gravity seemed to shift and I felt like I would fall forward,

so I couldn't even try to put the socks on while standing up.

It hasn't been that long, but it feels distant.

---

It seemed like I couldn't do anything or didn't do anything at all

when I was hospitalized.

I remember trying to put on socks by myself at the hospital,

but it didn't work, so I never tried again from that moment.

When I came back home from the hospital, I started trying it again.

I remember feeling frustrated because it wasn't as good as I thought.

 

If this wasn't even good enough, how my life would be?

It was obvious even if I didn't look ahead...

Memories of my eyes going dark, and sobbing with mountain-like worry pass by.

---

Taking off and putting on pants was completely impossible

while standing with one foot.

One day, I decided to give it a try, so I tried it and it worked.

 

But I didn't even try anymore.

I was a little uneasy about putting it on, so I was worried that I might accidentally get hurt.

Then, I sat down on a chair to put it on and take it off since.

However, as it got colder and I had to move quickly.

So, I tried again and it worked.

---

It's the same today.

I got up, washed my face, changed my clothes,

and sat down in front of the computer,

but I felt like my feet were cold.

 

I felt like I needed to wear socks,

so I got up right away, found some socks, and put them on.

 

I hesitated for a moment,

but it was cold so I just tried it and I was able to do it.

 

A line from "The Guardian" drama comes to mind:

“There is no door that cannot be opened by a desperate craving to open.”

 

Maybe

it was because I was so cold that it sublimated into sincerity.

---

From now on, with what sincerity will I live my life?

That's the problem.

My body has improved so miraculously, but there is nothing after.

It is said that fruits grow where flowers bloom and fall.

 

I have never bloomed.

So, of course, the flowers won't fall,

and there won't be any after that.

---

Let’s take a closer look.

Maybe a flower has ever bloomed in my life so far.

Maybe I just don't remember.

I may have overlooked it without even realizing it.

 

I feel like there should be at least some hope,

but it seems like there are only bruises left where I have been living.

If you call that bruise a flower, it will change into a full blooming state.

---

Anyway, I am cruising towards the final page of rehabilitation.

Thankfully, the weather and wind were just right.

I am so grateful that I am cruising along as there are no better conditions than this.

 

Today is already the last day of February.

Tomorrow is March.

It feels like spring is already coming.

 

 

The original script of the above article was from

https://blog.naver.com/petitecole/223368721300